Stop Letting Others Define You

“Your value doesn’t decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth.”

People judge! They will always try to define you and put you in a box basis their own assessment and perception of you (doesn’t matter what authenticity the perception holds!) You may be defined basis your race, gender, weight, the way you dress, your social status, your sexuality, your friends (Heck! Even on basis of what you eat!) It is hard to live your best lives, when “best” is defined by someone else! Constant nay-sayers, consistent cynics, ceaseless criticism – they have many names and wear a many masks!



1. Among high school students, 44% of girls and 15% of guys are attempting to lose weight.
2. Over 70% of girls age 15 to 17 avoid normal daily activities, such as attending school, when they feel bad about their looks.
3. More than 40% of boys in middle school and high school regularly exercise with the goal of increasing muscle mass.
4. 7 in 10 girls believe that they are not good enough or don’t measure up in some way, including their looks, performance in school and relationships with friends and family members.
5. About 20% of teens will experience depression before they reach adulthood. (Read more here).

Good News – You self-worth is in your hands! Believing that YOU are in control and what matters is your undying faith in yourself and your actions – is the key to your happiness and contentment. This means that your happiness is independent of what another person thinks. When you make the decision to not let other people have the power to say who you are or who you should become, you open the door to be able to do things according to your own beliefs and principles. Someones’s perception of you does not define you!

It’s actually pretty empowering when you think about it – YOU are in command! Honestly, we have all had someone say something to us, that does not reflect who we truly are, but sometimes we give it so much power that we allow it to define us. It is natural for us, as humans, to seek validation (we all like to be liked!) We all need that “seal of approval” because that is what we are trained and schooled to do! However, the magic lies in understanding that – if someone doesn’t reciprocate our feelings or take us seriously, it doesn’t make us any less good or worthy. Once you understand that you are the master of your own fate, all you have to do next, is to take your convictions and values and let those shape your existence rather than another person’s validation or approval.

Yes, people will always have opinions! Agreed, there’ll be views and reviews! Fain enough, you’ll be demoralized! But remember that ultimately, the kind of parent, child, spouse, friend, colleague, human that you are, depends on you and your ACTIONS alone, not on someone else and their COMMENTS! As long as we do not lose the sight of who we truly are and stick to our basics and values, we will be able to focus on the positives and be conscious of what actually holds importance to us. (Eventually, leading to HAPPIER US!) 

PC – Pinterest

Remember, it doesn’t mean that you don’t value what others say, but it means that you don’t let them make or break you. Learn to filter, absorb what is worth your time and efforts and let go of rejections. You were born different (so is everyone else) and you are unique in your own wondrous way. No box, no outline can (or should) define you and your self-worth! Finally, never let someone else’s vision of you, guide how you see yourself. Believe that you are an absolutely amazing human being, because YOU REALLY ARE!

Boxes were meant for things and not people!

I hope this inspires someone to let go of someone else’s definition of them today! Break free!


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  1. Wise words. Growing up, being a teenager , being a young person in the world today comes with pressure on appearance that was nto the case when I was growing up. We had other stuff, there is always something. It is good to see posts like this to help young people maintain perspective and value.

    1. Thank you so much for stopping by!😊
      Peer pressure, compulsion to please everyone around and being negatively affected by nay-sayers are the common woes of this generation. Hopefully, my post will help clarify the delima of today’s world in some/little ways!😊