Hey Everyone! I hope y’all are having a great day. It’s time to kill the blues with some Real Talk and SELF CARE!
Let’s begin with the basics! For the lucky ones who have not come across such a breed of human life, a narcissist is a person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves. In other words, “narcissists are people who think the world revolves around them!” (If only!)
“The hated man is the result of his hater’s pride rather than his hater’s conscience.”
― Criss Jami, Diotima, Battery, Electric Personality
How do you know when you are dealing with a Narcissist?
1. CONVERSATION SCROOGE
The narcissist loves to talk about him/herself and doesn’t give anyone else a chance to take part in a two-way conversation and it is an extensive struggle to have your views and feelings heard. When (and if) you do get a word in, and if it’s not in agreement with the narcissist, your comments are likely to be corrected, dismissed, disregarded,or ignored.
2. RULE KILLER
The narcissist enjoys getting away with violating rules and social benchmarks, such as cutting in line, breaking multiple appointments, compulsive under/no-tipping, nicking office supplies, or disobeying traffic directives.
3. PRIVILEGE HUNTER
Narcissists often expect preferential conduct from others. They expect others to cater (often immediately) to their demands, without being considerate in return. In their mindset, the world revolves around them and you are too meager to care about!
4. OVERWHELMING PERSONALITY
Thinking of oneself as a matchless, or one of a kind superior figure – Some narcissists have an exaggerated sense of self-importance, believing that others cannot live or survive without his/her magnificent patronage.
5. PATRON OF NEGATIVE EMOTIONS
Many narcissists enjoy spreading and instigating negative emotions to gain attention, feel powerful and to keep you insecure and lop-sided. By making you feel inferior, they boost their fragile ego and (obviously) feel better about themselves! To make matters worse, they even throw a tantrum if you disagree with their views or fail to meet their set-expectations. They are extremely sensitive to criticism and typically respond with heated argument (fight) or cold detachment (flight). Additionally, narcissists are often quick to judge, criticize, ridicule and blame you.
6. MANIPULATION – USING OTHERS AS AN EXTENSION OF SELF
The narcissist uses his/her romantic partner, child, friend or colleague to meet their – unreasonable self-serving needs, fulfill unrealized dreams or to cover up self-perceived inadequacies and flaws.
HERE’S HOW TO DEAL WITH A NARCISSISTS
1 Don’t! Think of it as a sinking ship, a lost cause. Get out of there the first chance you get. Swim, dive, float! Get out!
2 Kiss Up Or Shut Up. If they’re your boss or they have power over you, fighting makes it worse. Sometimes, it’s easier to “Kiss Up” and abandon, for good! (FIND YOURSELF A NEW JOB!)
3 Know What You Want And Get A Payment Up Front. Don’t assume they’ll play fair! Rightness is just a facade for them. Don’t fall for their manipulations. (KEEP YOUR FACTS!)
4 Ask them, “What would people think?” They desire to be flawless. If they think they’ll look bad, they’ll behave. Threatening them with “social/public” scrutiny always, always scares the hell out of them. Everyday is a new battle with them and their self-centered, egocentric wits! You just need to learn the art of dodging them.
5 Don’t fight narcissism. Starve it! You are too exquisite to be victimized. Chose your fight and treasure yourself! Stay away from them and uphold the distance.
Reject them and they’ll flip out. Act feeble and they’ll try to victimize you. Expose them and they’ll hate you forever. (Trust me, I’ve lived, gotten hurt, grieved and learnt!) It’s just so not worth it!
Narcissists are hard nuts to crack! Sadly, their hearts either haven’t developed or have been shut down due to early Psychological Trauma(which scientifically, is a psychologically upsetting experience that produces an emotional or mental disorder or otherwise has lasting negative effects on a person’s thoughts, feelings, or behavior). Hard as it may be to comprehend, these people have little insight into their actions, nor do they regret them! My advise, set limits and say “NO” to them and in your heart! Be brave to gather all your strength and keep walking into the unknown towards something better. Be compassionate to yourself and know that you deserve a loving relationship with someone who can reciprocate that love. There is a wonderful world out there, with people who actually care. Don’t give up on yourself yet!
Here’s to leaving behind all the narcissist in our lives! Cheers!
Love,
36 Comments
Yes. I have been with some of them. The last one, and worst, was my partner only months ago. I’m still recovering from him.
I can understand, living with them is an everyday hell! I am GLAD that you are out of it.. Love and healing vibes to you!💕
Excellent post – sums it all up perfectly. Thanks for sharing
Thank you so much! 🙂
Excellent post. You are spot on. Sadly, my dad is a narcissist and it got to the point where I had to remove him from my life. It’s been 7 years now and they’ve been the happiest, most drama free years of my life!
I am so GLAD that you got out of it! Though I know it can be really difficult to end relationships (specially, if it is with a parent) but then sometimes you just have to say NO and remove unhappiness from your life! Love and positive vibes to you! 🙂 🙂
Your infographics are always so interesting and well done. Great post! These people are definitely a lot to handle.
Thank you so much Aixa!💕
Glad you like my info-graphics (though I am still learning and there is a long way to go!)
Hmm.. You are right hun. They are definitely a lot to handle!🙄
At one point in my life I was always surrounded by a lot of narcissistic people and I tell you it’s exhausting and very annoying.
Thank goodness I cut them all out of my life.
Great post.
Thank you so much sweetie!💕
I agree, it is tormenting! Thank God you are out of it!😇
Love this. I have an ex who is a narcissist and he still tries to control me 14 years later through my children. Check out my blog, can I share your post please
Yes please, feel free..
Once a narcissist, always a narcissist – they can’t change for anyone! The best way out – is to pack your bags and say bye-bye for good! No one needs “drama” in their lives.
I think we’ve all come across a narcissist at some point in our lives, do a frisk bunch!🤨😞😩
Ikr! So many of them!🤨
Definitely 🙃🤨
We all know at least one! Great post!
I agree.. I’ve met a too many!🤨
Thank you so much for reading!💕
They better not mess with you!! A known narcissist remedy; a Rebel! 😉😊
Hahaha.. I so agree with you! 😉😊
😉
I thought you posted this about me! I mean It’s obviously about me. 😜 I have no idea why but I somehow seem to have those kids who don’t realize that they are in a relationship with a narcissist come to me for advice. I typically give them this questionnaire I have found and when they realize that they are, they never realized, thought it had always been them, immediately wanted out but then become conflicted because they worry about their bf/gf. It’s so difficult to realize and then more difficult to accept.
You are so right – the denial damages more than the perpetuater! It’s a difficult situation to break out from, specially since the “doer” most of the times is a loved one who has almost all of his/her control over you!
You are doing a wonderful job of spreading awareness and inspiring “kids” – As always, it’s one step at a time!
It’s even harder to stop thinking it’s you. It amazes me how many of these narcissists have so programmed these bf/gf to actually react/respond feeling like they have no choice “it’s just the way it’s been). Worse is when these traits emerge as young as 15 years old. I really would like to research it and discover what lies beneath a narcissist. Is it a learned behavior or are they programmed, genetically, or with conscious intent…
So deep 😘
This is an interesting link that I stumbled across researching for the post –
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/narcissism
Well, I personally think that it’s more of an innate behavior that get’s heightened with experience and insight.
That makes total sense! Thanks for the link!
You are welcome!❤
Such a great topic! I always feel bad for the people that feel they have to cater to such beings….ugh No! I always enjoys your quotes too, you are very inspiring! 💕
You are way too kind! Thanks sweetie!!❤
You are absolutely right – it’s always best to get far away from such people, asap! 🙂
For sure!
Beautiful and helpful post Richa.😊 💕
Glad this post resonated with you sweetie! Thanks for reading!😊
What a pain, all narcissist should be curbed, our ears could do without their annoying me, myself and I stories.
I agree! The best way to deal with them is to ignore them at any cost! Our peace of mind is worth more any relationship(s) or negativity.
True that peace of mind is everything ❤️